Love Notes to Help the Clueless Find Clues

Love Note #1

Dear fashion editors of the world,

I could give two hoots what Michelle Obama is wearing.  No matter how much you try to convince us, or yourselves, she does not surpass Carla Bruni-Sarkozy in beauty, class, or style.  Or Jackie O.  Or Princess Diana.  Quite frankly, Michelle should not be mentioned in the same breath.

Please open your clue bag and get a clue. 

XOXO,
Tracy

Love Note #2

Michelle,

I'll get right to the point... this picture is hilarious.  What photographer took this shot?  And what news organization published it?  (Answer:  AP and The Chicago Tribune, respectively).  Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip look like munchkins, making you and hubby appear disproportionately large.

In addition to pointing out how bad photography can make one look ridiculous, please allow me to give you some free fashion advice. 

1. The A-line skirt makes you look very bottom heavy.  No girl wants to resemble a pear. 
2. The waist of the skirt sits too high for your body shape.  It looks like you don't have a waist.
3. Either un-tuck the blouse or wear a black one so the eye does not stop right below your chest.  A monochromatic look would be much more flattering in this case.
4. Shortening the skirt just a little or wearing a higher heel will give the illusion of longer legs.
5. Lose the Barbara Bush pearls. They're just not for you.

I know the world it telling you that you have fabulous style. Honey, they are lying to you because they have a crush on your husband.  It hurts to hear the truth sometimes, so hang in there.

Please let me know if there is anything else I can do to help.

XOXO,
Tracy